Articles

After Divorce: When Children Resist Seeing One Parent

Amid or following divorce or separation, some families face the issue of one or more children refusing to be in contact with one of the parents. While the dynamics of any family experiencing this can be quite complicated, children may behave in this way for a variety...

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Five Good Reasons to Try Co-Parenting Therapy

When parents divorce, they sometimes forget that their children didn’t also get a divorce. They still have their two-parent family, even if that family occupies two households instead of one. Sometimes, though, it seems too hard to figure out how to communicate with...

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Forgiveness and Divorce: 14 Considerations

This is a big topic. It may be at the core of why many divorces do not proceed well. The ability to forgive can be quite complex, depending on the events and issues under consideration. However, forgiveness may be one of the most important and perhaps most powerful...

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With Divorce, the Only Certainty Is Uncertainty

Change is difficult for most people. It is difficult whether we are the ones making the change or if the change is occurring because of someone else’s decision. This is most often true in the case of divorce. Whether we decide or our partner does, there will be...

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Divorce and Social Networking Sites

Welcome to the 21st century, where Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and a host of other social networking sites have made it possible for you to be in touch with your old high school or college friends, long lost relatives, people you worked with 15 years ago, and that...

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Eleven Reasons to Choose a Collaborative Divorce

One of the most difficult times in our lives is when we choose or are faced with changing some of the most basic aspects of how we live. Where we live, who we live with, what our children experience, how much financial security we have, or what kind of work we do are...

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Creating Divorce Rituals with Your Children

The decision has been made. You and your spouse are divorcing. There are a multitude of decisions to be made, and it is often difficult to know where to begin. You will be making decisions regarding when the children are with you and when they are with your spouse,...

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Who Gets Which Friends?

You’re getting a divorce. In addition to the friends you brought into the relationship, you and your ex have made many friends together through your children’s activities, your jobs and the places you have volunteered. You both rely on their friendships to help with...

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Five Rights Your Children Should Have in Your Divorce

We know that when a marriage ends it is the parents who are divorcing. But do we think about the fact that our children aren’t getting a divorce, they are getting two households in which to continue living with their family. Their parents relationship is changing to...

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Dating after Divorce: Blending Families

You’ve been divorced for three years and have been working at moving on in your life, establishing new relationships and feeling so much better about yourself than you have in a very long time. You are grateful for your friends and family and the support they have...

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The Greek Chorus and Your Divorce

Many of you may remember the role of the Greek Chorus in literature classes from high school or college. They appeared in the works of Sophocles, Aeschylus, Euripidies and Aristophanes, to name just a few. Their role was to explain what they thought was going on and...

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Can My Child Choose Which Parent to Live With?

On a fairly regular basis I am asked by a divorced parent how old their child must be before they can choose which parent they want to live with. Many parents tell me their child will be 12 years old, 13 years old, 14 years old soon and will be able to make their own...

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To Divorce or Not to Divorce, That Is the Question

You’ve been together now for about 14 years. For the past four-to-five years, you’ve wondered if you can stay together any longer. You’re interests have changed, you don’t enjoy doing things together as much. You find you are impatient and want to have the closeness,...

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Conflict and Co-Parenting: Mediums of Communication

You thought that getting divorced was going to make parenting easier. You thought your communication was going to improve because you weren’t living together anymore. You had high hopes that things would settle down and all the hurt, disappointments and anger would...

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Rights of First Refusal

As parents move into co-parenting after divorce, one of the many questions that arise is who will care for the children when the parent with whom they are scheduled to be cared for has to be somewhere else (a business trip, a doctor’s appointment, etc.) The right of...

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Ten Ingredients to Have in a Parenting Plan

When parents divorce, it begins a series of events that require thoughtful and considered decisions about their children’s future.  It soon becomes starkly evident how many decisions a parent must make on a daily basis and how much coordination it takes to make a...

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Curious about Curiosity?

People who have been in long marriages or relationships get to know each other rather well. They can often anticipate what the other person might say or do or think or want, you get the picture. In loving relationships, partners might sometimes have a reliance on each...

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The First Steps to Divorce

Many of you have been in the position of either deciding to divorce or having been asked for a divorce. Either way, you will be making important emotional, legal, and financial decisions with a person with whom you are most likely in some kind of conflict. As you...

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